I’ve been sitting here most of the morning with my laptop open on my bare legs staring out the window towards the mountains and the ocean wondering if I should write this. Then I realized I should, I should write how I feel in this moment to remember where I came from and how I’m feeling.
My chest is tight and my breath is shallow that I find myself sighing every few minutes to try and settle myself. It’s the feeling of being anxious and nervous, and as I search inward to find out why I realize it’s nothing I can change. Because it is change that is coming that is making me anxious. I’ve been longing for this change for quite some time and am always excited at the prospect of it. But now the longing is slowly becoming a reality and I can feel the tides changing, the season making room for the other.
As I take another deep breath, I have to remind myself that I want this, that I want to move forward. I must move both feet forward and make room for the change at hand.
My chest is tight and my breath is shallow, and even though I find myself sighing every few minutes to try and settle myself I know eventually it will pass and the change will come.