Lesley Stefanski

In the five and a half months I’ve been silent here, much has changed in my life. I finished my schooling and said good-bye to another chapter in my life, we packed up our familiar condo and moved across the road to a new one, we went on a spontaneous trip back to Europe where we visited London, Paris, and the region of Normandie in France. But the biggest change was realizing that my life would never be the same again, that whatever I attributed ‘normal’ to, I would never fully experience again. From that moment forward I would forever be a different person.

In the middle of May on the same day we found out that our offer on a new condo was accepted, we also found out we were expecting. In the middle of finishing up my program and working with wonderful clients I suddenly found myself dealing with being constantly hungry and no energy to dealing with the a month a half of intense morning sickness where I couldn’t hold anything down. It was so bad that I didn’t even get out of bed most days and when we were packing up our home and moving into a new one, my mum had to come and help while I laid on the bathroom floor hoping the cold tiles would cool me down.

I won’t go into the details, but it was one of the most frustrating moments of my life.

Once I felt like I could get out of bed, I suddenly found myself working back in corporate. None of my ideals of what my life would look like if I happened to ever to get pregnant were coming true. I went through probably another month of dealing with what I thought my life would look like to what reality really was. If I’m honest, I really resented being pregnant and the changes it was putting on me that were completely out of my control.

Once I thought I had morning sickness and my resentment under control, my body has been wrecked with migraines. I’ve dealt with them before, but being pregnant has left me with no way to take medication other than rest and a dark room.

Then, in the middle of it all, there was a moment when we thought our baby was sick and we didn’t know if our future would have our baby in it or not. I have never felt so completely helpless than those three weeks of stressful waiting.

Yet through every single step of this season in my life, this has been the only time I have ever felt so confident and peaceful about the decisions I’m making. Call it mother’s intuition or instinct but I’m so at peace with everything this pregnancy has brought me. It is not the pregnancy I dreamed of (mostly because I never dreamed of being pregnant nor wanted children) but I do believe that this is the pregnancy I’m supposed to have. I’m being shown something: that through this all I’m still living a gorgeous life, that I’m surrounded by positive, beautiful, and loving family and friends. That life isn’t always what we expect it to be, but that the beauty is still there if you’re willing to look for it.

That even though life throws you curve ball after curve ball, your heart will expand to see beauty in moments that you would have hid from. That somehow when you think you can’t take anymore and you are weeping on the bathroom floor praying that someone would make it all stop, you find yourself with more strength than before and you’re able to stand tall (in four inch heels), head held high, hair done and feeling proud, graceful, and so full of love and happiness.

This year, on this Thanksgiving Monday, I am thankful for the life I am living. That I have a wonderful loving husband who has stood beside me (or comforted me when I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore), my family (both his and mine) who have done everything in their power to ease this pregnancy, for friends near and far who check in to see how I’m doing – even when I don’t have the strength or energy to send a response, and also for our baby that is strong, healthy, and growing in my belly – for all the little kicks when I sing, of somehow knowing when I need comfort it does a little tumble in my body, for teaching me that life isn’t perfect but no matter what it’s beautiful and so full of love.

In light of Thanksgiving, before we met up with family, Mister took me for a mini photoshoot to celebrate this season in my life. Even though it hasn’t been easy these pictures reflect internally how I feel: beautiful, elegant, sophisticated, and ready to face the world!

Sometimes the idea of giving can become overwhelming; for me I always feel like I don’t have anything to give or who would want anything from me. But what I’ve learned, is that through giving from the heart I have so much more within me to give. I almost can’t even stop the outpouring.

If you’ve been following this blog for awhile, or spent time reading through the years of archives, you’ll notice that I’ve been on a journey of how to give from the heart, while also feeding you as my reader. I spent so much time analyzing what you responded to or paying too much attention to what was trendy to talk about at that time that I became distracted by other things than what was truly on my heart. But also through all that analyzing and following trends I’ve allowed myself to truly open up to what is on my heart and go deeper with it; so that now I’m in a place of constantly wanting to give.

Which brings me to today…

I’m so overcome with joy lately with the responses I’ve been receiving that I wanted to give even further from my heart. I sent this out to my newsletter group yesterday so that they could get first dibs, and they grabbed quite a few of the spots, but now this is open to you as well.

I’m opening up 10 coaching session spots, to work with me for a limited time only. Each of the 10 people will receive 10, one hour coaching sessions so that they can take action, step into their true desires, and live out the life they have always dreamed of….All for free!

If you think that you are one of those people who are ready to live a truly beautiful authentic life and would love to work with me, click here, to view the page with the video and all the sparkly details of how to apply!

My newsletter group gets dibs on everything first, plus extra special videos along the way, so sign up if you’d like to be in the know!

There are bigger dreams sitting inside me, and this video was one of them. I created this months ago with the full intention of putting it on my blog right away, but I was scared of what my bigger dream meant for me. So I put it in a vault, essentially hiding myself from them.

So for months I sat on it, constantly going back and planning on when a more appropriate time would be to let go and just put it out there. The timing never seemed right. I even pushed this post back! I’m sometimes so scared of myself and what I am able to do, that I don’t let myself shine, and this is a true example of burring my dreams behind what I think I’m capable of.

However, after last week’s response and the difference it made not only in my life but also in yours I knew I couldn’t keep it locked up anymore, that the timing was now.

I’m scared of what it will mean to me now that I’ve responded to my bigger dreams, and I’m a little bit nervous you’ll think I’m bragging or showing off. But I’m not. This is me truly accepting who I am, stepping into my true authentic self, while creating a beautiful life that I’ve always dreamed of.

Everything you see in the video is who I was, who I am, and a glimpse of who I am going to be. I hope it inspires you embrace your bigger dreams and create the life you’ve always dreamed about.

I hope the video inspires you live your bigger dreams! If it does, please let me know either in the comments or respond via email, I always love hearing from you!

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I spent a week in California soaking up as much sun as I could since I knew it would end up raining the moment I returned to Vancouver. And that it did, and it rained hard. Other then that, California was fantastic! I was doing something that I felt born to do (helping another woman discover and choose what exactly she is passionate about in life, how her business can afford to live the life she wants, and marketing that business to the right client while enjoying that said life). I woke up every morning energized and excited to get stuff done and discover the more deeper aspects of her life and work and would fall to sleep completely content. I want to do this every day. And I will.

Once I returned back to Vancouver I had two days to relax while running errands to pick up notebooks and pens. I even got a cute little bag to take with me to class. This week I started a three month intensive course on Project Management at the University of British Columbia. The decision came after I knew that I wanted to help people design lives and businesses around what they love and are passionate about, but I knew that there would be project, programs, activities that people would want to launch but I didn’t really feel like I had the skills to help them launch their project successfully and in a timely matter. Now I can! And I’m so excited to see how combining lifestyle & business designing and project management will effect people’s lives.

Since I am in class full-time at this point I am finding myself a little bit overwhelmed. In the course of two weeks I went from living a very simple life to having a full schedule and an even longer to-do list. I’m pushing myself to excel in this class, working on polishing up my website and offerings so that I can start working with people immediately, as well as finding the time to enjoy life and continue to be the best version of myself possible.

There is a dream I’ve been holding very dear my to heart, one that some close friends know about, but not one I’ve ever shared publicly. I didn’t want to share it until it happened, but now it’s a dream that I have to allow others to live out for me.

On Friday evening we attended an event to celebrate our friends adopting a child – it was so much fun to hear everyone come together, play some music, and give their support to such an amazing family. You see, as much as I never desired having a child of my own…like ever, I did have a dream that perhaps we’d adopt one day. But now it’s a dream that I’m letting go. Instead watching other’s live it out for me and realizing there is so much pleasure from living vicariously through friends who are doing amazing things!

The reason why I’m sharing this is because I was adopted myself and am for ever grateful for someone being willing to chose me out of everyone and saying they want to help raise me to be come the woman I am today. Adoption is extrememly important to me and I want to support anyone who decides that is a road that they want to take to help grow their family.

To see a little bit of how my heart bursts at the idea of a little dark hand slipping into a pale one, I hope these videos can try and help you understand.